PANSIES

A former bully and his childhood victim meet again.

Ever since Alfie Bell went south to London, he’s not felt quite comfortable “oop north” in South Shields. In fact, he doesn’t really feel comfortable anywhere, despite his career successes. Though closeted when he left, he’s now out to his friends and family, but still struggles to accept himself in many ways, and can’t shake the uncomfortable feeling that he no longer fits in anywhere. When he’s home for a wedding, his discomfort drives him to a small bar where he meets a stranger, Fen, who is antagonistic but still wants to go back to Alfie’s hotel for a one-night stand. It’s not until after their encounter that Alfie realizes he actually does know Fen—they went to school together and, back when Alfie was in the closet, he was one of the boys who’d bullied Fen mercilessly for years. Now, Fen says he just wanted to see “the school bully demonstrating what a good little cocksucker he’s grown into.” The revelation shocks Alfie out of the life he’s settled into, and he finds himself leaving his important job and friends in London to drive his fancy sports car back home and try to apologize so he can see Fen again. Despite his understandable reservations, Fen has always daydreamed about Alfie and is curious enough to see whether he’s actually changed, so they begin spending much more time together, leading to some scorching-hot moments as well as many complicated emotions for both to work through. This is the fourth volume in Hall’s series of Spires stories, but it can be read as a standalone. Though this is a rerelease of a book Hall self-published in 2018, fans will be thrilled to revisit Fen and Alfie’s story, especially as Hall has annotated it throughout, sharing thoughts about the Northeast England setting, his intentions while writing the book (and how he reflects on them now), and how to write a Geordie accent. Though it’s likely not for readers who don’t care for former-bully-to-lover stories, any others looking for a steamy, emotionally driven contemporary romance will be delighted.

A compelling romance worth reading again, or for the first time.