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THREE THINGS ABOUT ME

A strange, unsatisfying debut.

A bunch of oddballs are transformed into customer-service representatives in this quirky first novel from British author Whiteley.

Born and raised in a fundamentalist commune, Amie knew little of the outside world before she was forced out with her father—the cult's one-time leader—for transgressions that were never explained to her. At middle age, Sam is coming to terms with the fact that the mild-mannered alter ego which once protected his identity as the Death-Defying Sputum has now become his actual identity. Meanwhile, Alma—if that's her real name—has fled Hollywood after a tell-all book and a very messy divorce have ruined her reputation and her career. These are three of the more colorful characters in Whiteley's debut. They are joined by a university drop-out who dreams of becoming a rock star; a spectacularly manipulative young chippy trying to scheme her way to the top; a onetime P.R. executive who may be a sociopath; and a serious, cynical woman who lost all of her friends in a horrible rappelling accident. This disparate group comes together in a new office building in a run-down British resort town, all of them seeking a better life through a career in customer service. Whiteley's mix of the wacky and the mundane is admirably cheeky, but the parts never quite come together to create a satisfying whole. For example, the presence of a retired superhero who once fought villains like the Fruit Bat and Feather-Tickler Woman introduces an element of the surreal into the story, but the fantasy never infects the realistic lives of the other characters. This isn't a novel so much as a bunch of underdeveloped short stories shuffled together like a deck of cards. Whiteley's observations about cubicle dwellers will be utterly familiar to anyone who has ever watched The Office or followed Dilbert in the funny pages, and the members of her large cast are not given enough space to grow into living, breathing characters.

A strange, unsatisfying debut.

Pub Date: July 1, 2007

ISBN: 978-0-230-00744-4

Page Count: 320

Publisher: Macmillan UK/Trafalgar

Review Posted Online: May 19, 2010

Kirkus Reviews Issue: June 1, 2007

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THE THINGS WE DO FOR LOVE

Heartfelt, yes, but pretty routine.

Life lessons.

Angie Malone, the youngest of a big, warm Italian-American family, returns to her Pacific Northwest hometown to wrestle with various midlife disappointments: her divorce, Papa’s death, a downturn in business at the family restaurant, and, above all, her childlessness. After several miscarriages, she, a successful ad exec, and husband Conlan, a reporter, befriended a pregnant young girl and planned to adopt her baby—and then the birth mother changed her mind. Angie and Conlan drifted apart and soon found they just didn’t love each other anymore. Metaphorically speaking, “her need for a child had been a high tide, an overwhelming force that drowned them. A year ago, she could have kicked to the surface but not now.” Sadder but wiser, Angie goes to work in the struggling family restaurant, bickering with Mama over updating the menu and replacing the ancient waitress. Soon, Angie befriends another young girl, Lauren Ribido, who’s eager to learn and desperately needs a job. Lauren’s family lives on the wrong side of the tracks, and her mother is a promiscuous alcoholic, but Angie knows nothing of this sad story and welcomes Lauren into the DeSaria family circle. The girl listens in, wide-eyed, as the sisters argue and make wisecracks and—gee-whiz—are actually nice to each other. Nothing at all like her relationship with her sluttish mother, who throws Lauren out when boyfriend David, en route to Stanford, gets her pregnant. Will Lauren, who’s just been accepted to USC, let Angie adopt her baby? Well, a bit of a twist at the end keeps things from becoming too predictable.

Heartfelt, yes, but pretty routine.

Pub Date: July 1, 2004

ISBN: 0-345-46750-7

Page Count: 400

Publisher: Ballantine

Review Posted Online: May 19, 2010

Kirkus Reviews Issue: May 15, 2004

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FIREFLY LANE

Dated sermonizing on career versus motherhood, and conflict driven by characters’ willed helplessness, sap this tale of...

Lifelong, conflicted friendship of two women is the premise of Hannah’s maudlin latest (Magic Hour, 2006, etc.), again set in Washington State.

Tallulah “Tully” Hart, father unknown, is the daughter of a hippie, Cloud, who makes only intermittent appearances in her life. Tully takes refuge with the family of her “best friend forever,” Kate Mularkey, who compares herself unfavorably with Tully, in regards to looks and charisma. In college, “TullyandKate” pledge the same sorority and major in communications. Tully has a life goal for them both: They will become network TV anchorwomen. Tully lands an internship at KCPO-TV in Seattle and finagles a producing job for Kate. Kate no longer wishes to follow Tully into broadcasting and is more drawn to fiction writing, but she hesitates to tell her overbearing friend. Meanwhile a love triangle blooms at KCPO: Hard-bitten, irresistibly handsome, former war correspondent Johnny is clearly smitten with Tully. Expecting rejection, Kate keeps her infatuation with Johnny secret. When Tully lands a reporting job with a Today-like show, her career shifts into hyperdrive. Johnny and Kate had started an affair once Tully moved to Manhattan, and when Kate gets pregnant with daughter Marah, they marry. Kate is content as a stay-at-home mom, but frets about being Johnny’s second choice and about her unrealized writing ambitions. Tully becomes Seattle’s answer to Oprah. She hires Johnny, which spells riches for him and Kate. But Kate’s buttons are fully depressed by pitched battles over slutwear and curfews with teenaged Marah, who idolizes her godmother Tully. In an improbable twist, Tully invites Kate and Marah to resolve their differences on her show, only to blindside Kate by accusing her, on live TV, of overprotecting Marah. The BFFs are sundered. Tully’s latest attempt to salvage Cloud fails: The incorrigible, now geriatric hippie absconds once more. Just as Kate develops a spine, she’s given some devastating news. Will the friends reconcile before it’s too late?

Dated sermonizing on career versus motherhood, and conflict driven by characters’ willed helplessness, sap this tale of poignancy.

Pub Date: Feb. 1, 2008

ISBN: 978-0-312-36408-3

Page Count: 496

Publisher: St. Martin's

Review Posted Online: May 19, 2010

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Nov. 1, 2007

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