A FIERCE BELIEF IN MIRACLES

In this memoir of recovery, Heck traces a path from trauma to a new self-awareness.

The author begins her book with an account of a horrifying assault in 1990, when she was employed as a high school chemistry teacher, living outside of Washington, D.C., and enjoying her summer vacation. An avid cyclist, she decided to go on a solo ride on an unfamiliar road, where a car pulled up next to her; the driver got out, pretended to ask for directions, and then punched her, raped her, and fled the scene. Heck unflinchingly walks the reader through the aftermath of the trauma, detailing the medical attention she received, including the administration of a rape kit. She also effectively shows how her physical injuries paled in comparison to the psychological ones. She notes how she struggled to return to work and had trouble telling her parents what happened to her; once-cherished activities—cycling, especially—no longer held appeal for her: “After being raped, breathing and ease became elusive,” Heck writes. “The trauma of the incident permeated the cells of my being.” She found fellowship and support in a self-defense class and companionship with a co-worker named Tom.(The author notes that some names and identifying characteristics have been changed.)Heck moved to Asheville, North Carolina, and married Tom in 1993; she went on to teach high school again and volunteer at a rape crisis center. Soon, she began leading assertiveness workshops that encouraged women to “stand in their power.” The latter parts of the book, devoted to alternative medicine and healing practices, are less engaging, although they’re full of honest self-assessment. She recounts her first meetings with Dr. Pat, a chiropractor and kinesiologist, and Barb Kobe, an instructor who uses dolls to facilitate personal healing. Overall, Heck is a bracingly honest and clear writer, and her penchant for detail, down to reports of what she ate for breakfast on a given day, gives her recollections an intense feeling of immediacy. Her prose is simple and graceful, always lucidly capturing her sense of personal significance.

A candid remembrance that examines pain and celebrates growth.