An insightful perspective on clinical and spiritual recovery.
A self-help book about using trauma as a catalyst for personal development.
Ungerland, a psychologist and seminar leader, offers a well-researched guide to a psychological theory called post-traumatic growth. She defines it as “an empirical model...for turning crisis into expansion” with seven stages, and she illustrates it with stories of several people who’ve emerged from traumas (whose names have been changed). Brad, for example, was a victim of fraud; Sarah lost her legs after being hit by a car; and Jane stayed in a dysfunctional marriage. The interview subjects show significant commonalities; for example, during the initial “immobilization” phase, patients believed that their issues were truly insurmountable, and only after mourning their losses could they move forward: “The truth will set us free, eventually, but first it will make us suffer,” Ungerland writes. Jane “spent years in denial” about her marriage before accepting its failure, but after a period of grief, she had an epiphany: “I knew that if I continued life as it was, I was going to get physically sick, that it could kill me. That was the morning that I started to be different.” This type of revelation takes place during the model’s third phase, Ungerland writes, “once we have reached a point of utter surrender.” During the remaining steps, subjects envisioned happier lives for themselves and developed useful traits, such as flexibility and autonomy. The book includes several unsurprising recommendations, such as meditation, journaling, and pursuing therapy. However, Ungerland adds depth to the book by incorporating poetry by Rumi, historical anecdotes, and colorful metaphors, as when she describes post-traumatic growth as “a GPS of the soul.” The seven stages can seem overly linear; surely, some patients regress before moving forward again, and this possibility remains unexplored. But the book is especially informative about escaping a mentality of victimhood, which requires hope: “Maybe the first step is to realize that we will somehow be held and nourished, often when we least expect it, by a friend or by a perfect stranger…or by a moonrise on a river…anything can heal us.”
An insightful perspective on clinical and spiritual recovery.Pub Date: June 2, 2020
ISBN: 978-1-59715-210-5
Page Count: 211
Publisher: Chapel Hill Press
Review Posted Online: Oct. 29, 2020
Review Program: Kirkus Indie
A conversational, pleasurable look into McConaughey’s life and thought.
All right, all right, all right: The affable, laconic actor delivers a combination of memoir and self-help book.
“This is an approach book,” writes McConaughey, adding that it contains “philosophies that can be objectively understood, and if you choose, subjectively adopted, by either changing your reality, or changing how you see it. This is a playbook, based on adventures in my life.” Some of those philosophies come in the form of apothegms: “When you can design your own weather, blow in the breeze”; “Simplify, focus, conserve to liberate.” Others come in the form of sometimes rambling stories that never take the shortest route from point A to point B, as when he recounts a dream-spurred, challenging visit to the Malian musician Ali Farka Touré, who offered a significant lesson in how disagreement can be expressed politely and without rancor. Fans of McConaughey will enjoy his memories—which line up squarely with other accounts in Melissa Maerz’s recent oral history, Alright, Alright, Alright—of his debut in Richard Linklater’s Dazed and Confused, to which he contributed not just that signature phrase, but also a kind of too-cool-for-school hipness that dissolves a bit upon realizing that he’s an older guy on the prowl for teenage girls. McConaughey’s prep to settle into the role of Wooderson involved inhabiting the mind of a dude who digs cars, rock ’n’ roll, and “chicks,” and he ran with it, reminding readers that the film originally had only three scripted scenes for his character. The lesson: “Do one thing well, then another. Once, then once more.” It’s clear that the author is a thoughtful man, even an intellectual of sorts, though without the earnestness of Ethan Hawke or James Franco. Though some of the sentiments are greeting card–ish, this book is entertaining and full of good lessons.
A conversational, pleasurable look into McConaughey’s life and thought.Pub Date: Oct. 20, 2020
ISBN: 978-0-593-13913-4
Page Count: 304
Publisher: Crown
Review Posted Online: Oct. 27, 2020
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Dec. 1, 2020
BOOK REVIEW
An above-average celebrity memoir from an intriguing spirit.
The longtime Hollywood actor looks back.
“What does it mean to be a ham?” asks the author, rhetorically. “Was I a ham? I was naturally and inordinately theatrical. I liked to carry on. I liked attention. I liked extravagant speech. I liked to emote. I liked to talk.” All of these qualities are abundantly evident in Kilmer’s memoir, which is as much a spiritual journey as it is a chronicle of his life and career. The author recounts the depth of his Christian Science faith, his formative years in a family of privilege in Los Angeles, his teenage romance with fellow actor Mare Winningham (“my first real girlfriend”), his training and rebellion at Juilliard, and his decision to leave Broadway for Hollywood. There, he writes, “I was not yet a burgeoning talent but ‘Cher’s lover,’ ” when she was in her mid-30s and he in his early-20s. After scoring big with Tom Cruise in Top Gun, Kilmer turned down Blue Velvet and Dirty Dancing: “Neither part spoke to me.” He played Jim Morrison in Oliver Stone’s The Doors, which he considers “one of the proudest moments of my career.” Marlon Brando and Sam Shepard went from being idols that Kilmer worshipped to becoming friends. He was slated to star as Batman in three films but jumped ship after Batman Forever, which he considers “so bad, it’s almost good.” He married and divorced British actor Joanne Whalley and wooed Daryl Hannah (“kind of the female me, only better”), and he wrote and starred in a one-man show as Mark Twain. When he was hospitalized for surgery due to his throat cancer, he prayed, he read Twain and Christian Science’s Mary Baker Eddy, and he “didn’t wrestle with my angels. I sang and danced with them.” Kilmer was never a shrinking violet, and he still refuses to wilt.
An above-average celebrity memoir from an intriguing spirit. (photos)Pub Date: April 21, 2020
ISBN: 978-1-9821-4489-0
Page Count: 320
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Review Posted Online: March 11, 2020
Kirkus Reviews Issue: April 1, 2020
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