ATTACK OF THE VAMPIRE WEENIES

The lead miner of the “ha-ha-horror” vein offers 33 more microtales (all but three newly minted) in a fifth Weenies collection. Most end badly for a young narrator or protagonist: In the title story plus three more, vampires triumph over obnoxious teens; in others a ghost, a malicious elf, swarming spiders and bees, all-too-omnivorous “MutAnts” and reanimated skeletons likewise snuff out the incautious or naïve. The laws of physics come into play when television-addict “Rapt Punzel” carelessly throws her huge weight of hair out a window. All humanity waxes rank and tubby after a young inventor finds a way to turn soap into candy. And a lad discovers that playground “Cooties” aren’t as intangible as he thought. Lubar keeps the pace changing and injects plenty of humor—most notably and hilariously a clueless student’s run of luck in a geography bee (A country on the Strait of Hormuz? “Oh, man.” Oslo is the capitol of what country? “No way”). He rounds it off with a closing section of story notes; about "Cooties," he writes, "I was thinking about cooties (I have too much leisure time), and it hit me that someone has to be the last person to have them." All in all, the gathering assays out as rich in eye-rollers, groans and mild chills. (Funny horror short stories. 11-13)