HOW TO BE A PERSON IN THE WORLD

An advice columnist provides real examples of the problems people face.

Popular New York Magazine advice columnist, author of "Ask Polly," Havrilesky (Disaster Preparedness, 2010) shares a series of letters that cut to the chase on a variety of topics. Do you need to know what to do when you contract a sexually transmitted disease? Do you want to transition from a party girl to a more responsible adult without taking all the fun out of life? Are you searching for a lifetime partner in all the wrong places? The author tackles all these heady issues and more in her no-nonsense, in-your-face, funny-yet-useful answers. Havrilesky uses examples from her own complicated life to help readers understand that they are not alone, that she too has encountered numerous problems and been able to find solutions. One common theme is the importance of not dwelling on mistakes. “You have to make peace with yourself,” writes the author. “Push away the bad voices, again and again, and replace them with something kinder and more patient. Say to yourself, ‘I’m broken right now, but I’m doing my best.’ Take in the electricity, the shivers, the rough-hewn fear of your raw state, and eventually, if you welcome these feelings in enough without fighting them, you’ll find inspiration and comfort there.” Whether you’ve committed the “cardinal friendship sin” of dating an ex-boyfriend of a lifetime friend, are struggling to choose between a career as a musician and its inherent demands or the possibility of marriage and children with a woman you love, or are reaching a certain age in life and realize you no longer want to be alone, Havrilesky will tell it straight as to what you should and shouldn’t do to remedy the situation.

Funny, frank advice for people searching for solutions to a myriad of relationship issues.