DIRTY KITCHEN

A hard journey to freedom.

Making her book debut, Damatac weaves history, mythology, and recipes into an affecting memoir of abuse, grief, longing, and frustration. Born in the Philippines, Damatac left for the U.S. with her family in 1992 and spent 22 years living as an undocumented immigrant before finally emigrating to England, where she is now a British citizen. Her migration, she writes, has taken her “from secrecy to revelation,” “from fear to hope.” The material hardship that her family encountered because of their status as illegal residents was compounded by her father’s violence and abuse. Erupting in uncontrollable anger, he beat her viciously, behavior she ascribes in part to “internalized colonial oppression and shame.” Colonized by the Spanish and Americans, oppressed by the long dictatorship of Ferdinand Marcos, Filipinos have a long history of being exploited and demeaned. Many recipes that Damatac includes reflect this history. Sisig na Baboy, for one, a stew of pigs’ ears, snouts, feet, intestines, “is what Filipinos eat when all the best parts are taken by occupying American forces.” Filipinos like her parents went to the U.S. in search of a better life but discovered only more exploitation. “Our college-educated, white-collar parents became minimum-wage grocery store workers,” the author writes. Eventually, with the luck of a valid Social Security card, her mother landed a job in a bank, where she was able to rise to higher levels; Damatac worked part time throughout her schooling, handing over her earnings to the father who grew increasingly manipulative and cruel to her and her mother. Diagnosed with depression, anxiety, and ADHD, Damatac made three suicide attempts; on a path to independence strewn with obstacles, including rape, extortion, and betrayal, she has emerged as a survivor, her determination forged by a “lineage of hardship.”

A disquieting tale of trauma.