THE DOVE IN THE BELLY

In 1977 North Carolina, a gay college student ruminates on identity, desire, and loss through a tumultuous relationship.

Abandoned by his mother right before spring semester exams, college junior Ronny finds a room last minute in a boardinghouse and a part-time newspaper job for the summer so he can stay in Chapel Hill. In contrast to his mother’s many marriages, Ronny has never had a boyfriend, and he knows his unstable connection, with Ben, the football player he tutors, won’t last. Ben may like him when they’re alone, but Ronny knows he’ll leave him behind to marry one of his many girlfriends someday. Despite his jealousy and Ben’s manipulation and emotional abuse, Ronny becomes entangled in Ben’s life as Ben struggles with the imminent loss of his mother, who is dying of cancer. A nonlinear narrative progression emphasizes the on-and-off cycle of Ronny’s relationship with Ben. It also draws attention to Ronny’s lack of growth as he falls into the same patterns from the beginning to the unfulfilling end. Although Ronny acknowledges his need for growth, particularly around his internalized homophobia, he never changes and even intentionally imperils another gay man to provoke Ben. Ben may never harm Ronny physically, but he threatens and demeans him. Characters excuse Ben’s behavior as immaturity, a personality quirk, or grief. Well-constructed prose can’t redeem the draining co-dependence in this emerging adulthood romance that may hold more appeal for adult readers. Ronny and Ben are cued as White.

Tiresome and moody.