BUT YOU'RE STILL SO YOUNG

Schaefer’s breezy survey examines the dilemmas facing Americans in their 30s.

The author of Text Me When You Get Home, now in her 40s, discusses her own experiences and those of seven other men and women, "all part of today's sprawling middle class,” as they face five life transitions that in earlier times often occurred significantly earlier in one’s life span. These include completing school, leaving home, marrying, becoming financially independent, and having a child. Schaefer, who began this book before the pandemic, touches briefly on its role in slowing these achievements down, but she focuses primarily on pre-pandemic life. The author occasionally refers to other books, generally pop sociology like Gaily Sheehy’s Passages or Jill Filipovic’s The H Spot, and quotes celebrities like Jennifer Aniston, but she pays most attention to documenting the lives of herself and her subjects. While these anecdotes are entertaining, in occasionally uncomfortable ways, the individuals that Schaefer profiles are hardly representative of the range of 30-something experience. Two are stand-up comedians attempting to find success in Los Angeles, sometimes relying on money from their parents; another quit a stable job to pursue entrepreneurship; one is a stay-at-home father writing a novel. Alongside their stories, Schaefer chronicles her own familiar struggles within the 21st-century journalism landscape. Most of her subjects are impetuous—e.g., using a $10,000 loan to go on a spending spree or saying things like, "Let's be irresponsible with it. Let's go to Italy”—which means little reader sympathy for their plights even as they attempt to take risks and follow their dreams. While a book about delayed adulthood in the U.S. could be useful, this one covers such a narrow spectrum of individuals that it's difficult to extrapolate any meaningful conclusions from their experiences. By contrast, Sheehy’s book included interviews with 115 people.

A disappointingly superficial approach to a potentially rewarding topic.