Certainly not revolutionary, but Alexandre’s light, practical tips and upbeat attitude show that she’s on your side, even if...
Advice for determining whether a love interest is worth the time, and tips on how to mold your current partner into a decent person.
Alexandre’s conception of a gentleman is “not defined by some old school notions like age or occupation or a code of dress” or “some archaic definitions of class.” She emphasizes the importance of ignoring society’s version of the ideal man–tall, handsome, wealthy–and instead, seeking a passionate person (not to be confused with an arrogant loudmouth) who can appreciate life’s little pleasures. The ability to value life and hold nature in high regard are also important qualities, says Alexandre. She offers definitions of “gentleman” throughout history, providing examples of model men such as Jesus, Jimmy Carter and naturalist Galen Rowell. Her friendly tone lends the text a feeling of gentle familiarity, as if a close friend were offering advice, though her more political musings may not connect with some readers–after quoting from the legend of King Arthur, she says, “It sounds to me like Arthur would be disappointed in the current rules of war. Remember Shock and Awe?” Nevertheless, Alexandre is a helpful cheerleader, encouraging readers to be proactive on dates by asking lots of questions. When entangled in an uncomfortable situation at home, use external examples of admirable behavior as guidance–though her own model may be somewhat dubious: “If your man is rude, you may say how you admire James Bond…because he is always so tactful and kind, even before killing his enemy.” She also includes a questionnaire for men and suggestions for raising a gentlemanly son.
Certainly not revolutionary, but Alexandre’s light, practical tips and upbeat attitude show that she’s on your side, even if you may not agree with everything she says.Pub Date: Feb. 2, 2006
ISBN: 0-9776687-0-3
Page Count: -
Publisher: N/A
Review Posted Online: May 23, 2010
Review Program: Kirkus Indie
These platitudes need perspective; better to buy the books they came from.
A lightweight collection of self-help snippets from the bestselling author.
What makes a quote a quote? Does it have to be quoted by someone other than the original author? Apparently not, if we take Strayed’s collection of truisms as an example. The well-known memoirist (Wild), novelist (Torch), and radio-show host (“Dear Sugar”) pulls lines from her previous pages and delivers them one at a time in this small, gift-sized book. No excerpt exceeds one page in length, and some are only one line long. Strayed doesn’t reference the books she’s drawing from, so the quotes stand without context and are strung together without apparent attention to structure or narrative flow. Thus, we move back and forth from first-person tales from the Pacific Crest Trail to conversational tidbits to meditations on grief. Some are astoundingly simple, such as Strayed’s declaration that “Love is the feeling we have for those we care deeply about and hold in high regard.” Others call on the author’s unique observations—people who regret what they haven’t done, she writes, end up “mingy, addled, shrink-wrapped versions” of themselves—and offer a reward for wading through obvious advice like “Trust your gut.” Other quotes sound familiar—not necessarily because you’ve read Strayed’s other work, but likely due to the influence of other authors on her writing. When she writes about blooming into your own authenticity, for instance, one is immediately reminded of Anaïs Nin: "And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” Strayed’s true blossoming happens in her longer works; while this collection might brighten someone’s day—and is sure to sell plenty of copies during the holidays—it’s no substitute for the real thing.
These platitudes need perspective; better to buy the books they came from.Pub Date: Nov. 1, 2015
ISBN: 978-1-101-946909
Page Count: 160
Publisher: Knopf
Review Posted Online: Aug. 15, 2015
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Sept. 1, 2015
An intriguing approach to identifying and relating to one’s emotions.
An analysis of our emotions and the skills required to understand them.
We all have emotions, but how many of us have the vocabulary to accurately describe our experiences or to understand how our emotions affect the way we act? In this guide to help readers with their emotions, Brackett, the founding director of Yale University’s Center for Emotional Intelligence, presents a five-step method he calls R.U.L.E.R.: We need to recognize our emotions, understand what has caused them, be able to label them with precise terms and descriptions, know how to safely and effectively express them, and be able to regulate them in productive ways. The author walks readers through each step and provides an intriguing tool to use to help identify a specific emotion. Brackett introduces a four-square grid called a Mood Meter, which allows one to define where an emotion falls based on pleasantness and energy. He also uses four colors for each quadrant: yellow for high pleasantness and high energy, red for low pleasantness and high energy, green for high pleasantness and low energy, and blue for low pleasantness and low energy. The idea is to identify where an emotion lies in this grid in order to put the R.U.L.E.R. method to good use. The author’s research is wide-ranging, and his interweaving of his personal story with the data helps make the book less academic and more accessible to general readers. It’s particularly useful for parents and teachers who want to help children learn to handle difficult emotions so that they can thrive rather than be overwhelmed by them. The author’s system will also find use in the workplace. “Emotions are the most powerful force inside the workplace—as they are in every human endeavor,” writes Brackett. “They influence everything from leadership effectiveness to building and maintaining complex relationships, from innovation to customer relations.”
An intriguing approach to identifying and relating to one’s emotions.Pub Date: Sept. 3, 2019
ISBN: 978-1-250-21284-9
Page Count: 320
Publisher: Celadon Books
Review Posted Online: June 22, 2019
Kirkus Reviews Issue: July 15, 2019
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