THE NATURAL MOTHER OF THE CHILD

A powerful memoir in essays about the author’s experiences with nonbinary parenthood.

Though the literature on parenthood is boundless, books on nonbinary parenthood are scarce. In his debut, Belc explores the universal emotions of ambivalence, joy, and occasional dread while simultaneously braiding in threads of his gender expression, partnership, and youth. Arranged in patchwork fashion (several essays were previously published), this intimate tapestry of a family includes numerous anecdotes about many of Belc’s formative moments and experiences, including his early years as a girl in Rockaway Beach participating in Irish dance and playing whiffle ball with siblings. “I love my brothers,” writes the author of those times, “but I am mad they got to be boys.” Among other strands, Belc discusses his complex relationship with his father (“I always thought my father wished I was a boy, but by the time I was it was too late”), the history of breasts, and his bewilderment when the adoption papers for he and his partner’s son listed him as “the natural mother of the child,” a phrase that “made me cringe. It made me rage. My relationship with Samson could be natural without my having to stand up in court and say I was a mother.” Belc smoothly weaves in scientific and social research, even if the timeline isn’t always easy to follow. But such is life: abstract, nonlinear, unable to be forced into tidy compartments. At times, the use of third person is excessive, a literary garnish to a story that is already rich in content. Nonetheless, Belc develops a candid, gritty, tender story that should garner empathy and understanding regardless of a reader’s background. In this multilayered narrative, augmented with black-and-white photos, the author successfully holds readers’ attention all the way through the last poignant line.

With vivid rawness, Belc paints an impressionist mural of what it means to be a parent while also birthing his true self.