MARRIAGE MINDED

Berger leads the reader through an alphabetically structured self-help manual about finding a compatible, marriage-minded partner.

This book’s dating advice, based on the author’s own experiences and her years of work as a therapist, may seem old-fashioned at times, but it’s also consistently friendly, with a hopeful tone. It discusses a wide variety of topics, touching on the ineffable chemistry between strangers and how relationships benefit from empathy and humor and can be brought down by secrets. Readers also get Berger’s insights into modern facets of dating with an eye toward marriage, such as online dating apps. Along the way, she’s very encouraging and pragmatic, oscillating between specific tips for specific situations, such who should pay for a first date, and more abstract concepts, such as serendipity, respect, and openness. Also included are exercises designed to help readers contemplate their own priorities, as well as an appendix with further tips and prompts. Berger notes that her likely readership will be single women, and this could be further narrowed to straight, middle-class women with highly traditional expectations. It’s admirable that the author is clearly committed to encouraging and strengthening long-lasting marriages. However, some of her tips come across as simplistic, and she too confidently promises success. The A to Z structure of the book gives the initial impression that the book is comprehensive and ordered; in reality, though, it prevents significant and logical progression from one topic to the next. The overall tone is kindly and wise, but its anecdotes can feel repetitive at times. And although there are some references to popular researchers and authors, as well as notes and a reading list, there seems to be a general lack of evidence-based theories and suggestions.

An upbeat but unevenly executed dating-advice guide.