FOREVER IS NOW

In the aftermath of yet another incident of police brutality, a teen tries to find her way forward.

Sadie was already managing generalized anxiety when, while being dumped by the girlfriend who made her feel safe, she witnesses police violently attacking another Black girl. The events trigger a debilitating panic that prevents her from leaving home, even to attend the protest that she wants to participate in. Instead of spending the summer interning at the local creative writing center, Sadie has to relearn how to exist in the world as a bisexual Black person with anxiety and agoraphobia and, eventually, how to use her voice, find joy, and move beyond the safety of her home. Despite the physically contained setting of the majority of the book—Sadie initially struggles to even reach the backyard—her Oakland, California, community is richly and authentically textured, with most of the characters cued as Black or brown. Verse narration is intercut with text from Sadie’s social media posts, effectively capturing the nature of contemporary organizing and community-building. Nuanced depictions of intercommunity tensions—between Sadie’s empathetic dad and her brusque mom, between her bold, activist, nonbinary best friend and her tentative, Black transracial adoptee new crush—help propel the narrative. Lockington’s real achievement here, though, is the tenderness with which she captures the utter vulnerability, strength, and beauty of a “sad, anxious Black girl.”

Intimately and immensely powerful.