A LIBERTARIAN WALKS INTO A BEAR

Good-natured account of a New Hampshire town where living free and the possibility of dying go hand in hand.

Magazine journalist Hongoltz-Hetling opens his narrative with a firefighter who holds government in contempt even if he draws a salary from it. The firefighter put out the word that the little burg in which he lived, “a flyspeck town buried in the woods of New Hampshire’s western fringe,” could be a paradise for libertarians, if only enough of them would move there and take control of—yes, the government. Libertarians arrived just in time for an infestation of hungry black bears. Enter a conundrum of libertarian logic: Bears pose a danger, but nowhere in the Constitution does it say that the government has the power to intervene. It’s an argument, writes the author, that goes back to the Colonial era, when frontier settlers took it upon themselves, rather than the hated crown, to engage in self-defense. “Anti-tax, anti-law,” the libertarians did what libertarians do: They argued over purity while trying to defund such things as the public library. The bears advanced their own arguments—and, according to a local bear authority, bears are smart, self-aware, and capable of cooperating “to enforce a bear justice system.” Moreover, they had a local ally who was happy to feed them as well as a town that, while sheltering a few poachers and plenty of gun nuts, couldn’t quite get it together to solve the problem. In the end, “the so-called Free Town” (and local tent city, since many of the newcomers lacked the means to buy property) project melted away. The bears were one thing, but the libertarians, in the end, decided they liked basketball courts, baseball fields, and even libraries and moved on. “They don’t recognize,” our firefighter concludes, “that the town was already free.”

An entertaining sendup of idealistic politics and the fatal flaws of overweening self-interest.