THE KNOW-NOTHINGS

The Stupids have nothing on housemates Boris, Morris, Doris, and Norris, an affectionate quartet as long on silly ideas as they are short of attention spans. Hunger gnaws, but they can't quite get food to the table; noodles straight out of the box are too hard to eat, and even stomping on them doesn't make them any softer. Banana skins taste terrible, but no one wants to strip poor bananas. At last they decide to go out for french fries. Where? To France, of course, which looks just like their own town. Alley (Edward Is Only a Fish, 1994, etc.) captures the innocence of the Know-Nothings perfectly, as they sit around the table puzzling over empty soup bowls, race about waving their stubby arms enthusiastically, and march home, congratulating each other for being so clever. Steer chuckling readers to the kindred stories in Alvin Schwartz's All of Our Noses Are Here (1985) or to Joanna and Philip Cole's Big Goof and Little Goof (1989). (Picture book. 5-7)