ACE YOUR LIFE

A pragmatic, step-by-step guide to self-acceptance and understanding that focuses on personal growth.

Many people reach toward fulfillment only to find satisfaction just out of reach, or, sometimes, very far away. They find themselves “bogged down in the stuckness,” which Maidenberg defines as a cycle of regret and hopelessness—one that’s often but not always made worse by trauma, stress, and other emotional pain. Maidenberg’s ACE method is named for its three basic pillars—acceptance, compassion, and empowerment—but before delving into these, she explores the functions of the mind, particularly how it works to avoid uncomfortable situations. This inclination, she notes, can also obscure one’s core values, which affect one’s chosen goals and actions. By practicing mindfulness, completing questionnaires, and doing self-guided growth exercises, she aims to help readers discover these values and work toward meaningful change. With this information, Maidenberg writes, one may begin to cultivate radical self-acceptance, inner and outward compassion, and clearer self-perception. The author also provides examples from sessions with her own patients (with names changed). In each case, she expands on an aspect of ACE, emphasizing personal improvement but not neglecting self-care or health. The exercises are largely practical, drawing on aspects of cognitive behavioral therapy, various studies, and the author’s own life and work. Chapters end with QR codes that link to talks and self-guided meditations. Overall, for a guide that’s so heavily focused on the self, its process rarely feels solitary. Readers will find the various sections are easy to revisit, which makes sense, as the book stresses that ACE is a circular process in which one constantly reviews one’s thoughts, values, and actions. A list of additional readings and extensive citations is included for further study.

A logical and highly accessible practice-based self-help resource.