MONSTERS IN MY MIND

A group of people must contend with their inner demons as they navigate trauma in Oliveri’s novel.

Oliveri’s story, told through multiple characters’ perspectives, focuses on their negative inner voices: the “monsters” that fill them with self-doubt, prey on their insecurities, or convince them to act poorly—and effectively turn them into the worst possible versions of themselves. Michael Conifer is the new kid in a suburban Colorado high school; he’s a bit nerdy, and he’s at war with an inner monster named Beel, who makes him believe that he has little value as a person. Michael has a crush on Rachel Kalopoulos, a girl who spends most of her time smoking cannabis and avoiding her father, John, a wealthy cannabis grower and seller; he’s in talks to work with Lorne Conifer, Michael’s father, who’s running for mayor. Lorne is portrayed as a truly vile person whose inner voice, Carmen, gives him permission to be absolutely awful to everyone, particularly his wife, Michelle. What Lorne doesn’t know, however, is that Michelle’s unnamed inner voice has been making plans to kill him. The conflicts all come to a head after Michael tries to smoke cannabis for the first time with Rachel. When Lorne learns that his son has tried drugs, he flies into a violent rage. Later, while Michael is at the Greenwood Center—a rehabilitation facility where he was sent as a punishment—Michelle calls him to tell him some shocking, life-altering news, which later yields other surprising plot developments.

Oliveri’s tale is an ambitious one, making a bold attempt to present an examination of how inner voices can cause people to go down harmful paths. Although the overall premise of the novel is compelling, the author’s execution works against it. The inclusion of multiple characters’ points of view highlights the many different ways that inner voices can affect people, but having so many disparate perspectives makes the work feel cluttered; for example, Ms. Shelgren, Michael’s math teacher, doesn’t have a compelling arc and does little to serve or progress the story. Also, because each of the main players is essentially dealing with a similar issue—a negative and ultimately unhelpful force that keeps them from being kind, moral, or brave—the prose inevitably begins to feel repetitive. Oliveri’s plot is strongest when it emphasizes the characters’ emotional states, as in its portrayal of Rachel’s strained relationship with her father or Michael’s examination of his own trauma: “They were permacuts—paper-thin incisions that I felt deeply every time he [Lorne] ignored me, traded me in, left me out.” Yet even in these moments, useful exposition is often set aside in favor of quips from inner voices. Though the chapters from the perspective of “the monster” are meant to be menacing—particularly when the all-knowing being addresses the reader directly—they often come off as overwrought and repetitive. Oliveri’s story is certainly enthusiastic in its telling. However, it could have used some fine-tuning to make it more consistently engaging.

A tale with an intriguing setup that doesn’t fulfill its promise.