A heart-rending but informative end-of-life guide.
In this debut memoir and self-help book, Cohen offers advice on how to approach life after a terminal diagnosis.
The author and his wife, Marcia, had been married 37 years in 2019 when she was told that she had stage 4 pancreatic cancer, and just 160 days later, she passed away. But before then, Cohen and his spouse, who specialized in crisis management, developed a way of thinking that they came to call the “Smooth River.” Over the course of this book, the author draws on his personal experience to explain this concept, which they used to convey to medical staff the necessity of a “well-ordered and tranquil ending.” This multifaceted approach recognizes how society rewards those who fight and disparages those who give up. However, rather than emphasize the idea that a person must “fight” cancer, the author suggests that society should show greater consideration to how that person wishes to be treated. It’s a gentle, open-minded approach to end-of-life management that involves setting flexible goals and cultivating positive thoughts, such as “We’re all going to die. I’m just going sooner than I expected, but I have a lot to be thankful for.” Cohen also highlights the importance of “seeing one’s life as bigger than one’s condition.” The book offers practical and specific advice along the way, noting the benefits of keeping an event log and addressing whether one should have a do-not-resuscitate directive. Appendices feature Marcia’s own log and book list as well as a list of useful online resources, such as palliative care organizations.
Cohen’s writing achieves a rare balance, as it’s both practical and sensitive in character. The author is unafraid to confront the grim truth of end-stage cancer but seeks out positivity at the same time: “While we may not be able to control how, if, or when we get [cancer]; how it behaves; or how effective treatment will be, we do have a choice.” Cohen’s message is particularly powerful in how it advocates the agency of patients and their family members at a time when they may feel powerless: “We could confine our focus to [Marcia’s] health alone and stay in a dark place, or we could try as best we could to make this time really count.” Cohen conveys deeply distressing moments with poetic beauty, as when he envisions Marcia’s final moments: “as she crossed the divide, I would be there to take her in when she was no longer able to breathe. And then, by way of some ethereal transference, I would breathe for her and carry on.” In this book, the author courageously and movingly approaches a subject that many readers would prefer not to face, and, in doing so, he effectively presents the reality of life after a terminal diagnosis. This tender and startlingly lucid work offers patients and their loved ones a wealth of knowledge, and it may also show physicians a new way to help people learn to cope with the prospect of dying.
A heart-rending but informative end-of-life guide.Pub Date: Oct. 26, 2021
ISBN: 978-1-73750-340-8
Page Count: 288
Publisher: Smooth River, Inc.
Review Posted Online: Aug. 1, 2021
Review Program: Kirkus Indie
A blissfully vicarious, heartfelt glimpse into the life of a Manhattan burlesque dancer.
A former New York City dancer reflects on her zesty heyday in the 1970s.
Discovered on a Manhattan street in 2020 and introduced on Stanton’s Humans of New York Instagram page, Johnson, then 76, shares her dynamic history as a “fiercely independent” Black burlesque dancer who used the stage name Tanqueray and became a celebrated fixture in midtown adult theaters. “I was the only black girl making white girl money,” she boasts, telling a vibrant story about sex and struggle in a bygone era. Frank and unapologetic, Johnson vividly captures aspects of her former life as a stage seductress shimmying to blues tracks during 18-minute sets or sewing lingerie for plus-sized dancers. Though her work was far from the Broadway shows she dreamed about, it eventually became all about the nightly hustle to simply survive. Her anecdotes are humorous, heartfelt, and supremely captivating, recounted with the passion of a true survivor and the acerbic wit of a weathered, street-wise New Yorker. She shares stories of growing up in an abusive household in Albany in the 1940s, a teenage pregnancy, and prison time for robbery as nonchalantly as she recalls selling rhinestone G-strings to prostitutes to make them sparkle in the headlights of passing cars. Complemented by an array of revealing personal photographs, the narrative alternates between heartfelt nostalgia about the seedier side of Manhattan’s go-go scene and funny quips about her unconventional stage performances. Encounters with a variety of hardworking dancers, drag queens, and pimps, plus an account of the complexities of a first love with a drug-addled hustler, fill out the memoir with personality and candor. With a narrative assist from Stanton, the result is a consistently titillating and often moving story of human struggle as well as an insider glimpse into the days when Times Square was considered the Big Apple’s gloriously unpolished underbelly. The book also includes Yee’s lush watercolor illustrations.
A blissfully vicarious, heartfelt glimpse into the life of a Manhattan burlesque dancer.Pub Date: July 12, 2022
ISBN: 978-1-250-27827-2
Page Count: 192
Publisher: St. Martin's
Review Posted Online: July 27, 2022
A juicy story with some truly crazy moments, yet Anderson's good heart shines through.
The iconic model tells the story of her eventful life.
According to the acknowledgments, this memoir started as "a fifty-page poem and then grew into hundreds of pages of…more poetry." Readers will be glad that Anderson eventually turned to writing prose, since the well-told anecdotes and memorable character sketches are what make it a page-turner. The poetry (more accurately described as italicized notes-to-self with line breaks) remains strewn liberally through the pages, often summarizing the takeaway or the emotional impact of the events described: "I was / and still am / an exceptionally / easy target. / And, / I'm proud of that." This way of expressing herself is part of who she is, formed partly by her passion for Anaïs Nin and other writers; she is a serious maven of literature and the arts. The narrative gets off to a good start with Anderson’s nostalgic memories of her childhood in coastal Vancouver, raised by very young, very wild, and not very competent parents. Here and throughout the book, the author displays a remarkable lack of anger. She has faced abuse and mistreatment of many kinds over the decades, but she touches on the most appalling passages lightly—though not so lightly you don't feel the torment of the media attention on the events leading up to her divorce from Tommy Lee. Her trip to the pages of Playboy, which involved an escape from a violent fiance and sneaking across the border, is one of many jaw-dropping stories. In one interesting passage, Julian Assange's mother counsels Anderson to desexualize her image in order to be taken more seriously as an activist. She decided that “it was too late to turn back now”—that sexy is an inalienable part of who she is. Throughout her account of this kooky, messed-up, enviable, and often thrilling life, her humility (her sons "are true miracles, considering the gene pool") never fails her.
A juicy story with some truly crazy moments, yet Anderson's good heart shines through.Pub Date: Jan. 31, 2023
ISBN: 9780063226562
Page Count: 256
Publisher: Dey Street/HarperCollins
Review Posted Online: Dec. 5, 2022
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Jan. 1, 2023
SEEN & HEARD
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