A well-written memoir and testament to religion’s redemptive power.
Mocha tells his story of recovery, redemption, and faith in this debut memoir.
Though familiar with the jargon of evangelical Christianity from his childhood in the Bible Belt of Oklahoma, the author’s journey toward faith began in a drug-fueled stupor in his ex-girlfriend’s living room when he picked up a dusty Bible, opened it randomly to the Book of Malachi, and read the verse “Return to me, and I will return to you” before overdosing shortly thereafter. Much space in the book’s early chapters in this honest, raw memoir is devoted to the author’s decade of “bad choices,” introducing readers to the mindset of addiction—from the rush of serotonin, dopamine, and norepinephrine fueled by cocaine, ecstasy, and methamphetamine during a weekend bender to the subsequent crash and hopelessness felt by the subsequent “Suicide Tuesday.” Mocha would eventually make a month-long pact with God to attend church, and he serendipitously attended one popular with motorcycle enthusiasts, replete with leather jackets and boots, where he “fit right in.” While the sinner-to-saint narrative is well-trodden terrain, what stands out in this memoir is the author’s authentic grappling with faith. Even after saying a prayer of conversion, he notes, “I felt nothing,” fearing that his newfound faith “was just another hoax.” Though he would eventually become a faithful convert, Mocha candidly discusses the difficulties in applying faith to one’s life. Hearing cliched lines from preachers about “giving our financial problems to God” is one thing, writes Mocha, figuring out how to give when you barely have enough money for food and gas is another. Much of the book’s second half blends the author’s strained spiritual journey (with the goal to simply “survive the hell I had created”) with a travelogue. Disillusionment with American culture corresponded with sobriety, prompting the author to travel throughout Europe. These experiences, from Christmas in France to summer in Croatia, are detailed in multiple chapters, and correspond with his evolving new identity as a Christian missionary
Not really a cohesive autobiography, much of this narrative is told through short vignettes (what the author refers to as a “zoom-in to the incredible stories” of his spiritual transformation) that provide snapshots of Mocha’s adult life at various stages. This approach works well, as the book’s 40-plus chapters average no more than five pages in length and make for an engaging read that doesn’t overwhelm with superfluous detail. While the book is definitively a Christian work, the author does not shrink from uncomfortable spiritual conversations; nor does he wade into the politically fraught terrain of the intersection between faith and hot-button social issues (which, depending on the reader’s perspective, is either refreshingly apolitical or a cop out). The book provides a harrowing and brutal look into the thought-processes of addicts that may not make sense to those on the outside looking in, and it will help readers of all backgrounds to better understand addiction. It also strikes a successful balance in focusing on religion without being preachy, saving its most punishing jabs for the author himself, who required a multitude of “second chances for me to get free of the things that were taking my life from me.”
A well-written memoir and testament to religion’s redemptive power.Pub Date: N/A
ISBN: N/A
Page Count: 264
Publisher: N/A
Review Posted Online: Nov. 16, 2023
Review Program: Kirkus Indie
A blissfully vicarious, heartfelt glimpse into the life of a Manhattan burlesque dancer.
A former New York City dancer reflects on her zesty heyday in the 1970s.
Discovered on a Manhattan street in 2020 and introduced on Stanton’s Humans of New York Instagram page, Johnson, then 76, shares her dynamic history as a “fiercely independent” Black burlesque dancer who used the stage name Tanqueray and became a celebrated fixture in midtown adult theaters. “I was the only black girl making white girl money,” she boasts, telling a vibrant story about sex and struggle in a bygone era. Frank and unapologetic, Johnson vividly captures aspects of her former life as a stage seductress shimmying to blues tracks during 18-minute sets or sewing lingerie for plus-sized dancers. Though her work was far from the Broadway shows she dreamed about, it eventually became all about the nightly hustle to simply survive. Her anecdotes are humorous, heartfelt, and supremely captivating, recounted with the passion of a true survivor and the acerbic wit of a weathered, street-wise New Yorker. She shares stories of growing up in an abusive household in Albany in the 1940s, a teenage pregnancy, and prison time for robbery as nonchalantly as she recalls selling rhinestone G-strings to prostitutes to make them sparkle in the headlights of passing cars. Complemented by an array of revealing personal photographs, the narrative alternates between heartfelt nostalgia about the seedier side of Manhattan’s go-go scene and funny quips about her unconventional stage performances. Encounters with a variety of hardworking dancers, drag queens, and pimps, plus an account of the complexities of a first love with a drug-addled hustler, fill out the memoir with personality and candor. With a narrative assist from Stanton, the result is a consistently titillating and often moving story of human struggle as well as an insider glimpse into the days when Times Square was considered the Big Apple’s gloriously unpolished underbelly. The book also includes Yee’s lush watercolor illustrations.
A blissfully vicarious, heartfelt glimpse into the life of a Manhattan burlesque dancer.Pub Date: July 12, 2022
ISBN: 978-1-250-27827-2
Page Count: 192
Publisher: St. Martin's
Review Posted Online: July 27, 2022
A juicy story with some truly crazy moments, yet Anderson's good heart shines through.
The iconic model tells the story of her eventful life.
According to the acknowledgments, this memoir started as "a fifty-page poem and then grew into hundreds of pages of…more poetry." Readers will be glad that Anderson eventually turned to writing prose, since the well-told anecdotes and memorable character sketches are what make it a page-turner. The poetry (more accurately described as italicized notes-to-self with line breaks) remains strewn liberally through the pages, often summarizing the takeaway or the emotional impact of the events described: "I was / and still am / an exceptionally / easy target. / And, / I'm proud of that." This way of expressing herself is part of who she is, formed partly by her passion for Anaïs Nin and other writers; she is a serious maven of literature and the arts. The narrative gets off to a good start with Anderson’s nostalgic memories of her childhood in coastal Vancouver, raised by very young, very wild, and not very competent parents. Here and throughout the book, the author displays a remarkable lack of anger. She has faced abuse and mistreatment of many kinds over the decades, but she touches on the most appalling passages lightly—though not so lightly you don't feel the torment of the media attention on the events leading up to her divorce from Tommy Lee. Her trip to the pages of Playboy, which involved an escape from a violent fiance and sneaking across the border, is one of many jaw-dropping stories. In one interesting passage, Julian Assange's mother counsels Anderson to desexualize her image in order to be taken more seriously as an activist. She decided that “it was too late to turn back now”—that sexy is an inalienable part of who she is. Throughout her account of this kooky, messed-up, enviable, and often thrilling life, her humility (her sons "are true miracles, considering the gene pool") never fails her.
A juicy story with some truly crazy moments, yet Anderson's good heart shines through.Pub Date: Jan. 31, 2023
ISBN: 9780063226562
Page Count: 256
Publisher: Dey Street/HarperCollins
Review Posted Online: Dec. 5, 2022
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Jan. 1, 2023
SEEN & HEARD
© Copyright 2025 Kirkus Media LLC. All Rights Reserved.
Follow
Popular in this Genre
We can’t wait for you to join Kirkus!
It’s free and takes less than 10 seconds!
Already have an account? Log in.
OR
Sign in with GoogleTrouble signing in? Retrieve credentials.
Welcome Back!
OR
Sign in with GoogleTrouble signing in? Retrieve credentials.
