GITA DESAI IS NOT HERE TO SHUT UP

In 1992, Stanford freshman Gita Desai dreams of becoming a doctor.

Gita is motivated in part by the encouragement of Pinky Auntie, her father’s sister who lived with Gita’s family for a few years before abruptly returning to India when Gita was 9. Pinky’s disappearance haunts Gita, as do unsettling memories involving Neil, Pinky’s husband, and Neil’s friend Bhavin. At college, Gita meets fellow freshmen Jane West and Marisol Walter, and they immediately form a trio. Gita, whose family is Gujarati, cherishes these new friendships but is exasperated by the endless attention that her two charming, beautiful friends receive from men—attention that never extends to her. Gita’s realization that she longs to be desirable coincides with her first sexual encounter, which turns into assault. She blames herself and tells herself she must “work hard and fix it,” but subsequent sexual encounters end similarly, with Gita unable to vocalize her refusal and dissociating. As Gita’s self-shaming intensifies, so does the return of disjointed childhood memories—until she arrives at an awful truth. The sense of dread builds until an explosive, cathartic confrontation occurs. Patel, whose own experiences inform this story, infuses Gita’s first-person narration with thoughtfulness and humor that make her growing confusion and self-loathing cut deeply. Thankfully, Gita’s friends are there to support her when she finally finds her voice.

Funny, messy, gut-wrenching; a tough read that's worth the discomfort.