Next book

A DELIGHTFUL LITTLE BOOK ON AGING

A helpful, uplifting work for readers handling the challenges of growing older.

Awards & Accolades

Our Verdict

  • Our Verdict
  • GET IT

A series of quick reflections explores the realities of getting older.

“I did more than a few things right and more than a few things wrong,” Raffelock writes in her slim nonfiction debut. “Now I get to stand in the light of my truth and share my lessons with the world around me.” This well-designed book presents these lessons as a series of thoughts and vignettes from the author’s life, moments that stand out and memories that have come to signify key aspects of aging for her. The tone Raffelock takes throughout the work is resolutely optimistic and affirmative despite being cleareyed about the fact that one of the defining characteristics of age is loss: “Friendships end. Children move away. The role of work or career that once defined us is relegated to memory.” The resulting grief can manifest itself as melancholy, angst, or “unexplainable tears.” In quick, upbeat chapters, the author urges her peers to remain engaged and moving. She offers several tips for ways to do this: Mentor the young, make things like art or music, find new friends, investigate the latest technology, and—in a note sounded frequently in the book—remember to exercise regularly. She transforms many of her experiences into quippy slogans like “Life is too short to hate your thighs,” “Your weight is not a gauge of your worth, and neither is your bank balance,” and the essential theme of the whole volume: “Don’t freak out about getting old.” And all of these nuggets of wisdom are leavened with gentle humor (“Sagging has set into places that I didn’t know could sag”) and an all-embracing compassion. Aging invites us to grow into a deeper beauty, she writes, “it’s no longer the smile on our face as much as it is the expression in our heart.” Raffelock’s book will be a much-needed boost to readers of all ages.

A helpful, uplifting work for readers handling the challenges of growing older.

Pub Date: April 28, 2020

ISBN: 978-1-63152-840-8

Page Count: 136

Publisher: She Writes Press

Review Posted Online: Feb. 12, 2020

Kirkus Reviews Issue: March 15, 2020

Next book

THE LAWS OF HUMAN NATURE

The Stoics did much better with the much shorter Enchiridion.

A follow-on to the author’s garbled but popular 48 Laws of Power, promising that readers will learn how to win friends and influence people, to say nothing of outfoxing all those “toxic types” out in the world.

Greene (Mastery, 2012, etc.) begins with a big sell, averring that his book “is designed to immerse you in all aspects of human behavior and illuminate its root causes.” To gauge by this fat compendium, human behavior is mostly rotten, a presumption that fits with the author’s neo-Machiavellian program of self-validation and eventual strategic supremacy. The author works to formula: First, state a “law,” such as “confront your dark side” or “know your limits,” the latter of which seems pale compared to the Delphic oracle’s “nothing in excess.” Next, elaborate on that law with what might seem to be as plain as day: “Losing contact with reality, we make irrational decisions. That is why our success often does not last.” One imagines there might be other reasons for the evanescence of glory, but there you go. Finally, spin out a long tutelary yarn, seemingly the longer the better, to shore up the truism—in this case, the cometary rise and fall of one-time Disney CEO Michael Eisner, with the warning, “his fate could easily be yours, albeit most likely on a smaller scale,” which ranks right up there with the fortuneteller’s “I sense that someone you know has died" in orders of probability. It’s enough to inspire a new law: Beware of those who spend too much time telling you what you already know, even when it’s dressed up in fresh-sounding terms. “Continually mix the visceral with the analytic” is the language of a consultant’s report, more important-sounding than “go with your gut but use your head, too.”

The Stoics did much better with the much shorter Enchiridion.

Pub Date: Oct. 23, 2018

ISBN: 978-0-525-42814-5

Page Count: 580

Publisher: Viking

Review Posted Online: July 30, 2018

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Aug. 15, 2018

Categories:
Next book

THE ART OF SOLITUDE

A very welcome instance of philosophy that can help readers live a good life.

A teacher and scholar of Buddhism offers a formally varied account of the available rewards of solitude.

“As Mother Ayahuasca takes me in her arms, I realize that last night I vomited up my attachment to Buddhism. In passing out, I died. In coming to, I was, so to speak, reborn. I no longer have to fight these battles, I repeat to myself. I am no longer a combatant in the dharma wars. It feels as if the course of my life has shifted onto another vector, like a train shunted off its familiar track onto a new trajectory.” Readers of Batchelor’s previous books (Secular Buddhism: Imagining the Dharma in an Uncertain World, 2017, etc.) will recognize in this passage the culmination of his decadeslong shift away from the religious commitments of Buddhism toward an ecumenical and homegrown philosophy of life. Writing in a variety of modes—memoir, history, collage, essay, biography, and meditation instruction—the author doesn’t argue for his approach to solitude as much as offer it for contemplation. Essentially, Batchelor implies that if you read what Buddha said here and what Montaigne said there, and if you consider something the author has noticed, and if you reflect on your own experience, you have the possibility to improve the quality of your life. For introspective readers, it’s easy to hear in this approach a direct response to Pascal’s claim that “all of humanity's problems stem from man's inability to sit quietly in a room alone.” Batchelor wants to relieve us of this inability by offering his example of how to do just that. “Solitude is an art. Mental training is needed to refine and stabilize it,” he writes. “When you practice solitude, you dedicate yourself to the care of the soul.” Whatever a soul is, the author goes a long way toward soothing it.

A very welcome instance of philosophy that can help readers live a good life.

Pub Date: Feb. 18, 2020

ISBN: 978-0-300-25093-0

Page Count: 200

Publisher: Yale Univ.

Review Posted Online: Nov. 24, 2019

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Dec. 15, 2019

Close Quickview