BLACK AMERICAN REFUGEE

A memoir interrogating the ways in which living while Black in America is akin to being in an abusive relationship with a narcissist.

Drayton returned to her homeland of Tobago after becoming exhausted by the constant abuse she endured as a Black woman in the "United States of White America.” In this expansion of a New York Times article, the author describes a life rich in both experience and trauma, insightfully creating a conceit that runs throughout: America is a narcissist, and living in America as a Black person is to be in an abusive relationship. Several chapters open by explaining a stage in the cycle of abuse, relating them to Drayton’s experiences in the U.S. "The science of psychology,” she writes, “calls the early phase of a narcissistic relationship 'love-bombing.’ In these early, idyllic moments, hopeful, fated, and foundational memories are made that keep us coming back to what becomes the cycle of abuse.” Drayton demonstrates this idea via memories of her New Jersey girlhood, when the gleam of the American dream was still present. Those early experiences eventually gave way to devaluation, discard, moments of calm, gaslighting, and, finally, the possibility of reconciliation. Drayton arrives at her insight through distance, explaining that "from an ocean away, I had fuller access to my heartbreak and rage in a way I never could when those powerful feelings had to coexist with my drive to survive within the system.” What is unclear is how she identifies as a refugee; in the book, she omits a line that appears in the article: "The United Nations defines refugees as people who flee their homes because of war, persecution or violence." It’s not difficult to infer how she fits this criterion, but while refugee is in the title, it is almost nowhere in the memoir. Despite this lack of clarity, the book is a welcome addition to the literature on race in America.

Drayton has a powerful story and the voice to do it justice.