THE HOW

A heartfelt, artful manifesto focused on living fully and authentically.

Poet Daley-Ward addresses readers directly and speaks for them collectively, in addition to sharing her own experiences, in an earnest effort to offer them a reflection of themselves as well as their potential. “We must know,” she begins, “there are no truths but the ones that we arrive at on our own.” This admittedly indirect path—what she describes as “the great work of meeting yourself”—defines this book. The author includes exercises and affirmations designed to help readers examine and redefine “what we think life is all about…what we think work is, and to release the idea that we must suffer and struggle for the things that we want.” She addresses feelings such as restlessness, dissatisfaction, anxiety, depression, insecurity, isolation, romance, self-compassion, gratitude, and grief, proposing solutions such as simplifying, writing down one’s dreams, and taking time every day away from the phone. She suggests myriad practices of self-inquiry to attune readers to their inner wisdom and joy. “If you are not spiritually fit right now,” she warns, “running anywhere else is pointless. The next place will never save you.” Other tidbits of advice include: “Just be more you: that’s the solution”; “We should always be letting go”; “You have to save yourself and worry about the rest later”; “Expression is relief, and surefire medicine.” Throughout this slim book, the author strikes a balance between self-help and confession. For example, when she shares her own knowledge that she can never look to anything external as a way out of herself—although that doesn’t stop her from trying—she opens up space for readers to reflect on their own accounts of avoidance and/or real desires. She creates connections, much like a circuit closing, and invites her audience on a voyage of self-discovery.

By turns simplistic, elegiac, and illuminative.