A madcap survivor’s memoir about a monstrous romantic relationship.
A man with the nom de plume Mr. Perpetual Survivor recounts his abusive marriage to a narcissist in this debut memoir.
The author met Blake on a gay dating app: Blake was a 25-year-old Army vet with musical aspirations, and Perpetual Survivor was a 25-year-old computer programmer with a blackbelt in the Korean martial art Tang Soo Do. The two hit it off despite the differences in their personalities—the author was adventurous yet easy-going, more interested in exploring than settling down; Blake, on the other hand, was assertive, with strong opinions and more traditional ideas about relationships. “I got a high-level description of his life that sounded true,” recalls PS of their first day together. “He was constantly being victimized by other people and was very good at making you pity him; it was clear he was a lost soul who needed a leg up.” Blake’s stories of his time in Iraq and Afghanistan, and of his alcoholic father, particularly stoked the author’s sympathies. Very quickly, however, Blake revealed himself to be a manipulative schemer. Only a few days after meeting each other, Blake hit PS up for money, threatening to key his car if he didn’t give it to him. The author paid him in the hopes that Blake would leave. Instead, Blake moved into his apartment. Attempts to end the relationship and get Blake out of his life proved entirely ineffective. “You committed to me for life,” Blake told the confused PS, still only days into their relationship. “You promised to take care of me forever, breaking a vow like that can get you killed.” Despite the constant manipulation and financial drain, the author continued to be with Blake, going so far as to move to a new city with him, buy a house with him, and eventually, marry him. By the time PS was to learn whether or not “breaking a vow” really could get him killed, it was almost too late.
There are plenty of stories about toxic relationships with manipulative abusers, but Blake surely sits highly in the ranks of memoir monsters. In addition to Blake’s more violent tendencies, he forced PS to buy him a $4,500 pipe organ and even played a role in the author’s parents’ divorce. His ultimate fate, revealed at the end of the book, is truly wild—if it is to be believed. Perpetual Survivor is not an entirely credible narrator—early in the book, he tells a story about getting injured on a hike and rescued by a female bear who helped drag him back to town (he admits there is “a slight chance it was a fantasy”). He also tells a story about escaping a 100-person lynch mob in Georgia by relying on his skills as a martial artist. Oddly, these tall tales do not really detract from his narrative, which, after all, is about the experience of being made to feel that you’ve lost control of your own story. This is a dark work of autobiography, but it is also sensational, insightful, and gruesomely funny.
A madcap survivor’s memoir about a monstrous romantic relationship.Pub Date: Feb. 3, 2024
ISBN: N/A
Page Count: 224
Publisher: Self
Review Posted Online: March 1, 2024
Review Program: Kirkus Indie
A blissfully vicarious, heartfelt glimpse into the life of a Manhattan burlesque dancer.
A former New York City dancer reflects on her zesty heyday in the 1970s.
Discovered on a Manhattan street in 2020 and introduced on Stanton’s Humans of New York Instagram page, Johnson, then 76, shares her dynamic history as a “fiercely independent” Black burlesque dancer who used the stage name Tanqueray and became a celebrated fixture in midtown adult theaters. “I was the only black girl making white girl money,” she boasts, telling a vibrant story about sex and struggle in a bygone era. Frank and unapologetic, Johnson vividly captures aspects of her former life as a stage seductress shimmying to blues tracks during 18-minute sets or sewing lingerie for plus-sized dancers. Though her work was far from the Broadway shows she dreamed about, it eventually became all about the nightly hustle to simply survive. Her anecdotes are humorous, heartfelt, and supremely captivating, recounted with the passion of a true survivor and the acerbic wit of a weathered, street-wise New Yorker. She shares stories of growing up in an abusive household in Albany in the 1940s, a teenage pregnancy, and prison time for robbery as nonchalantly as she recalls selling rhinestone G-strings to prostitutes to make them sparkle in the headlights of passing cars. Complemented by an array of revealing personal photographs, the narrative alternates between heartfelt nostalgia about the seedier side of Manhattan’s go-go scene and funny quips about her unconventional stage performances. Encounters with a variety of hardworking dancers, drag queens, and pimps, plus an account of the complexities of a first love with a drug-addled hustler, fill out the memoir with personality and candor. With a narrative assist from Stanton, the result is a consistently titillating and often moving story of human struggle as well as an insider glimpse into the days when Times Square was considered the Big Apple’s gloriously unpolished underbelly. The book also includes Yee’s lush watercolor illustrations.
A blissfully vicarious, heartfelt glimpse into the life of a Manhattan burlesque dancer.Pub Date: July 12, 2022
ISBN: 978-1-250-27827-2
Page Count: 192
Publisher: St. Martin's
Review Posted Online: July 27, 2022
A juicy story with some truly crazy moments, yet Anderson's good heart shines through.
The iconic model tells the story of her eventful life.
According to the acknowledgments, this memoir started as "a fifty-page poem and then grew into hundreds of pages of…more poetry." Readers will be glad that Anderson eventually turned to writing prose, since the well-told anecdotes and memorable character sketches are what make it a page-turner. The poetry (more accurately described as italicized notes-to-self with line breaks) remains strewn liberally through the pages, often summarizing the takeaway or the emotional impact of the events described: "I was / and still am / an exceptionally / easy target. / And, / I'm proud of that." This way of expressing herself is part of who she is, formed partly by her passion for Anaïs Nin and other writers; she is a serious maven of literature and the arts. The narrative gets off to a good start with Anderson’s nostalgic memories of her childhood in coastal Vancouver, raised by very young, very wild, and not very competent parents. Here and throughout the book, the author displays a remarkable lack of anger. She has faced abuse and mistreatment of many kinds over the decades, but she touches on the most appalling passages lightly—though not so lightly you don't feel the torment of the media attention on the events leading up to her divorce from Tommy Lee. Her trip to the pages of Playboy, which involved an escape from a violent fiance and sneaking across the border, is one of many jaw-dropping stories. In one interesting passage, Julian Assange's mother counsels Anderson to desexualize her image in order to be taken more seriously as an activist. She decided that “it was too late to turn back now”—that sexy is an inalienable part of who she is. Throughout her account of this kooky, messed-up, enviable, and often thrilling life, her humility (her sons "are true miracles, considering the gene pool") never fails her.
A juicy story with some truly crazy moments, yet Anderson's good heart shines through.Pub Date: Jan. 31, 2023
ISBN: 9780063226562
Page Count: 256
Publisher: Dey Street/HarperCollins
Review Posted Online: Dec. 5, 2022
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Jan. 1, 2023
SEEN & HEARD
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